Taming Your #careerlion Temper
Keeping your temper in control can be quite a challenge, especially when you are me. Even though I am very much working on keeping it in check, going through my daily stoics, I still lose it frequently. Not being a morning person and having to drive through traffic to work is also not very helpful. By the time I am on the motorway, I will have probably lost my temper again. Did I mention our street is adjacent to the access roads of two motorways? However, enough is enough, I need to tame my temper. For one thing, I am really not proud of it and actually feel a bit ashamed even. But most importantly, it is supposedly very bad for your health. I am not putting so much work into staying healthy, to wreck it on strangers in traffic for instance. Thinking (mostly hoping) I am not the only #careerlion with this issue, this article will uncover the tips and tricks into making this happen.
Thinking before you speak
Honestly, the tip is easier said than done. Motivated this time to make it work, I am sharing it with you anyway. If not only as a reminder to myself to finally start doing this! Who doesn’t have regrets about things they said in the heat of the moment? Now I mean, after having collected your thoughts and contemplating that all of your frustration wasn’t even worth it? An open door, but I guess still quite relevant and crucial if we want to control our emotions without them controlling our actions.
A good tip I found was to exercise more. Whenever you’re working out, your body will create stress reducing substances that also have a limiting effect on your anger. Also, you might just be too tired to even bother getting upset. I personally get quite frustrated at times, but then I just don't want to put energy into dealing with something so useless when I am tired.
Take a breather
Either take really deep and slow breaths or slowing count to ten to tame your temper. A big cliche, but just for that reason alone there must be some truth to it. The breathing will help you release the tension in your body and calm your frustration. Slowly counting to ten will ensure you think before you speak, giving some time for the rational part of your brain to catch up. These are just two examples, but whatever you do to release your body’s tension and taking some time for the rational thoughts to kick in should do the trick.
Avoid aggravating situations
I recently read that anger is actually just addictive. That puts it in a whole different perspective, right? If there is one thing we can learn from rehab programs for addicts, it is to remove yourself from potentially “dangerous” situations. In this case, you will have to identify those situations that aggravate you and simply try to avoid them as much as possible. Avoiding traffic in my case isn’t simple, but I have my ways. Two nights a week I stay longer and go to dance class or the gym straight from work for instance. That means two traffic jams less per week. Hopefully one day, I will find a pretty apartment in Amsterdam and scooter to work on a Vespa. A girl can dream people!
Reconnect with your emotions
This one is confronting, anger is usually a cover up for other emotions you are having. The more you are unable to express your real feelings, the more of a temper you will have. Is there something in your life that you are not dealing with or didn't deal with properly before? I guess I know what my emotions are as grief is a real bitch. Once in a while I will let myself be sad, but most of the time I just want to live my life enjoying the time we have left and not deal with all of that. We are all dying, we just don't know when ;).
Are you able to think before you speak? Or is this article the last nudge you needed to start your exercising regime, avoid aggravating situations, or do some (self-)therapy? Share your thoughts in the comment section below!